Thursday, February 4, 2010

Clam Chowder

Well, over the holidays, it seemed nothing could go right, no matter how hard I tried. I wanted to have a wonderful, loving, Christmas spirit in my home, and it seemed my girls were at each other more than ever, fighting. I had so much on my mind, little things kept happening that caused all sorts of frustration and stress. Just one example: we went to my sisters for Christmas Eve and were early enough that many cousins were out sledding behind their 4 wheeler. My girls, of course, wanted to jump in, but Eden didn't bring her coat, only a jacket. I hurriedly gave her my own coat so she wouldn't freeze since she wanted to go so bad. This all happened before we even walked inside, so it wasn't until AFTER that I realized I had my ONLY set of keys in my pocket!! They were going all over an open field near their home, and well, they were NOwhere to be found! Fun, fun!

There was one that took the cake, however. Many heard about our famous, double batch of Clam Chowder spilling in the car on the way to the Clark-Gardner Christmas party. (Yup, the whole pot, minus about an inch left at the bottom.) After all that effort, expense, and time, it was so frustrating to not be able to even share the fruits of my efforts in making it. But, as I cleaned up with Scott for an hour, in the cold, crying the whole time, I realized there were some good lessons to be learned. First, the very thing I was cursing, spilling a WHOLE POT of clam chowder all over the back seats of our car and through every seat belt buckle, nut, and bolt under our seats, was actually the thing that helped Scott and I reconnect and talk through things and me to feel the closeness I felt lacking a bit. I gained appreciation for the man who would scoop clams, and all it's chowder, out of every nook and cranny in our back seat, happily! I was grateful for his support, positive attitude, understanding, and help, and my heart was softened as we worked through it.
As I went home, I kept thinking the Lord MUST have wanted me to learn something through that experience and this is what I came up with:

  • When someone hears someone else is an hour late to a party, they may be a bit frustrated or put out and wonder why that person just didn't plan better or think through their time better. When someone hears they were an hour late because they were out in the cold cleaning up clam chowder all over their car through the tears, perspective instantly changes! Compassion, understanding, and empathy immediate replace judgment and callousness. I think we all have "clam chowder" type experiences that we hide and hope no one ever finds out. There are unknown heartaches, sorrows, and trials, that every child of God faces. If we could just give each other the benefit of the doubt, knowing they may be acting a certain way because of an unknown burden, we'd judge less, love more, and become less uptight about all the things around us that may cause us stress!
  • Next, a guy in our ward council made an awesome analogy concerning Nephi and his brothers getting the brass plates. We all know the story, but I hadn't ever thought of it quite so concretely as he explained. After listening to it, I took what he said, and added my own understanding and insights. He said that sometimes, when we think we're following the Lord and even on His errand, sometimes the results are so disasterous and don't work to such a degree, that we may begin to question if we are following His will at all! He spoke of the commandment for Nephi and his brothers to go get the plates. (You'd think, that the effort in just making the trip alone would be trial enough for the Lord to just help them get the plates, as commanded, and back on their way.) But after the first attempt fails, Nephi, maybe feeling he is inspired with another solution, has the idea of buying them with all the gold and silver from their previous home. This, too, fails, and they not only are robbed of their gold, but he also ends up getting beaten with a stick! Again, seeming evidence that they must NOT be doing "right" or the Lord's will at all, or it would be "working out". But interestingly enough, the very thing that looked like a total failure, losing all their gold and silver to such a wicked man and being threatened with their lives, became the thing that ultimately helped them accomplish their goal. Laban lusted after such worldly wealth. When he saw the treasure, he wanted it and coveted it. Once he took it, he must have been so happy. How would a man like Laban celebrate such a thing? By getting drunk. That act, becoming so drunk that he passes out in the street, becomes the very thing that leads to Nephi actually being able to obtain the plates! I think the Adversary tempts us to start doubting when things don't go our way. He tries to make us question if we really DID get an answer, or if we were following the Spirit, or start to wonder if our cares are important enough for the Lord to even be concerned about them. If Satan can get us to doubt this in the moment, then God's power, the power of faith, loses all force! And sometimes, when it looks the most bleak, something may happen that actually helps us accomplish the Lord's will for us, even when it looked impossible before.
I don't know if any of that made sense, but I have been thinking about it a lot and thought I'd share! I am just grateful for the knowledge that, even when life isn't giving us the "reward" of what we feel to be our efforts, and we lose all our "gold", that His purposes for our lives can be revealed in that same act of losing that "gold" and turn it into something much, much better.
So, here's to jumping into challenges with all faith, and NOT giving into the temptation to doubt God's love for us, or that He has a specific purpose for our lives! Love you all, Cheltz
PS...and NO, miraculously, our car DOESN'T stink of spoiled milk or clams! Genious!

2 comments:

THE ARMSTRONGS said...

Oh man Chelsea...I'm so glad your car doesn't smell like clams and thet Scott has found a job...huge blessings. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. What a great example of how we all can become stronger through our trials! I'm sure your Relief Society gals love you! Rebecca

Maria said...

I just thought I'd pop on over to see how you all are doing. I love your family photo. Such beautiful girls. I love that you have such a great perspective on life.